Latarian Milton for President

I just came across this video online. Apparently this kid named Latarian Milton decided to go tooling around in his grandmother's Durango a few days ago. The only problem? Latarian is 7.



Even after leaving a trail of disaster and possibly facing "just a little bit of no video games for a whole weekend," Latarian seems completely unnerved when facing the cops (let alone a major news crew). That kind of cavalier attitude is just the type of personality we need in Washington these days my fellow Americans. As a result, we here at the Dblog would officially like to endorse Latarian Milton for President of the United States (unfortunately for our suave hero, not everyone thinks as highly of him as we do).

Fuck the Superbowl

Honestly America, this whole fascination with football is a little late 70's, don't you think? As we try and match the sophistication of the Europeans, sports should increasingly become more of an after-throught in the present moment. Let's turn our attention away from touchdowns and cheerleaders to a more refined form of entertainment. Yes that's right, I'm talking about the annual Puppy Bowl!! Watching a full day of puppies romping around all cute and such is just the thing to take you from hoi polloi to elite in my book. Get with the program America, because only the common few should really care about such a barbaric game.

Ice Cream Is Going to Save the Day Again!

I just want to dance with my shirt off. But since I'm at work, I need to once again torture the world with my nonsensical jibberish. Or at least post someone else's. This important notice is just in from my beloved roommate, ChaCha Gruffenstein.

GOVERNMENT HEALTH WARNING
DO NOT SWALLOW BUBBLE-GUM !!

Newsflash: DON'T DO DRUGS

Unless of course you're an inverted centaur: