Wednesday, April 23, 2008

DiSaranno Scavenger (hunt)



If someone can tell me where in the city I can find Busch beer, I will buy that person a pound of italian (or other) sausage.

15 comments:

DiSaronno Storyteller said...

Legend has it there is a beer distributer somewhere near 13th and A. You have to go after midnight on a full moon. Bring with you a mason jar full of pigs blood and the ground jaw bone of a rat. Mix the two together in Tompkins Square park, then walk up the street stopping on every corner to kiss the ground. When you get to the shop, knock twice on the door, then slowly push it open. You will be transplanted into a magical world where little elven people fly through the air crying, and their tears are made of Busch.

MJ said...

Do i mix the blood and ground bone in the mason jar? if so, what do i do with it afterwards?

disaronno storyteller said...

no no, good fellow. do NOT mix the two in the mason jar. you need to mix them in the shell of a Ballantine's 40 that has been washed in gorilla vomit. Then, slowly walk around the entire park and drip the mixture along the sidewalk.

If you have already mixed the two in the mason jar, you can still find your way to Busch heaven by doing the following: add in the ash of a burnt lamb and bring mixture to a boil. Reduce heat, stirring every few minutes to make sure the bottom does not burn. Once the mixture has reduced, put into the oven. Bake on 350 for 25 minutes or until putrid and brown. Consume, and continue by walking up the street, kissing the ground at each corner.

Lamb said...

i'm pretty sure you're supposed to use goat ashes.

disaronno storyteller said...

goat ashes will work, but lamb ashes provide a finer ash, and therefore dissolve much more easily into the blood=ground bone mixture. Also, you need the end result to have a brownish tinge. If you use goat ashes, the casserole comes out looking a little green.

Goat said...

more than just a LITTLE green.

disaronno storyteller said...

well, now you are getting into goat diet. depending on what their folliage to feed consumption ratio, their ashes can range anywhere from ash-colored to fluorescent-lime-green. It all depends. That's why I still stand behind my original recommendation of using the ashes of a burnt lamb. They always come out the color of a friendly puffy cloud.

Cow said...

THE food for summer '08: the lamburger

disaronno storyteller said...

Jeez what's going on here? I feel like I'm having this conversation in a barn! Does anyone that walks on two legs (other than MJ) have anything to say?

PS - I don't walk on two legs. I float in my rocking chair to get around.

Rooster said...

cockadoodledoo!

cobra said...

STRIKE!!!!!!!!!

wombat said...

but I'm just a wombat, I could never leave a comment on a blog

mongoose said...

I am very easy to strike.

MJ said...

don't you mean "lucky strike," le mongoose?

in any case, the sausage goes to Mark Gastineau who found busch tall boys (regular and lite) on the corner of St. Marks and Ave A. In celebration, we're going to have a sausage party for the one-year anniversary of dblog.

Abe Froman said...

A Sausage Party? Without consulting me? Do you know who I am?!