A Bond: A Play in Fifty Acts: Act II

Act II: The French Excursion

(Continued from Act I, which was informally known as "La Poutine"



GUY IS HANGING FROM A NOOSE TIED AROUND ONE OF THE EXPOSED BEAMS THAT MAKES UP THIS EXQUISITE CEILING

D IS SMOKING A CIGARETTE, MORE SLOWLY THAN NORMAL PEOPLE. CLOSE TO THE END, SHE FLICKS IT AT THE SWINGING CORPSE

D: Looks like it's checkout time.

SHE TAKES THE REALLY NICE ELEVATOR DOWN TO THE FLOOR CALLED 'L' WHICH MEANS EITHER LOBBY OR LEVEL

D: Hey tuxedo slave, I need a car to your nearest Moroccan restaurant. Let's make this be.

Concierge: I guess I'm lucky. I guess you have luck. I guess luck is. There's a car waiting for you. It's outside.

SHE SWIRLS HER GUN IN THE AIR. RUNS OUTSIDE OF THE HOTEL., POCKETS THE SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONER

D: Salutations driver. Step on it, and step on it.

Car Driver: That's my job. I step on it. And I'm gonna stick to it.

THEY DRIVE WHEREVER THE FUCK THEY'RE GOING. DRIVER IS DRUNK. THEY SIDESWIPE A MOPED. IT'S A VESPA BEING DRIVEN BY A FLORIST. THIS VESPA WAS TERRIBLY TERRIBLY CONSTRUCTED. THE GAS TANK FELL IN THE ROAD AND HIT THE WINDSHIELD OF THE LIMO DRIVER AND ROBBED HIM OF HIS HEAD. THE OCCUPANTS SPILL OUT BECAUSE: WHAT OTHER CHOICE DO THEY REALLY HAVE? NOTHING REALLY. NONE OTHER CHOICE. IS THAT CLEAR? I THINK SO.

D FINDS ANOTHER TAXI BY GUNPOINT

D: Let's go to JFK and step on it. My boyfriend is in Paris and I really love him but he's caught up in the the DJ scene. For this reason, I need your livery services. I need them to be so fast, so so fucking fast. Deep inside of me fast.

Livery Driver: Whatever you want...Pay me and get your white ass to Paris. Good flight...not!

SHE GOES INTO JFK AND CHECKS HER BAGS. SHE HAS ONE CARRY-ON. SHE IS WAITING IN THE SECURITY LINE.

D: I just killed a man. Hurry up. I got a plane to catch. I don't have time for your x-ray. Do I look like I would?

Security Guard: I can call someone. I can make this hard for you.

D: I'm okay. I'll take my time. Sorry, I'm stressed out by air travel.

S: I see it all the time. Nice gun by the way.

D: Thanks, now I'll put my belt back on you professional woman.

SHE BOARDS THE PLANE AND FLIES TO PARIS. SHE GETS OFF THE PLANE AND GETS CAPPED BY HER PSYCHO KILLER BOYFRIEND.